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Saturday, January 06, 2007
Warning: Strong & Violent Languages/ 7:45 PM It could have been a very happy day... Woke up and was late for soccer. Thank goodness I wasn't the latest. Waited for another 10minutes before another 2 guys came, just nice to form 2 teams of 5 persons each. I've finally played the kind of football I've been yearning for, the kind that has been missing in my life for the past 2 years. I played with sheer determination, read the game rather well and played some good balls around. I didn't think much & let my instinct do the talking. Thankfully, I managed to score 3 goals today, which is considered an amazement. I've gotta thank my lucky stars for bestowing upon me today =) Then came the crashing news which undoubtedly destroyed my celebratory mood... I shan't name names here. Y, a friend of mine, borrowed my helmet about 3 months back for his unit's exercise. I sympathised him cos he'd lost his helmet in camp. It wasn't very nice to reject a friend's kind request. Besides, it WAS only for a week. When his exercise passed, I didn't receive any news regarding my helmet. Though we did meet up for 2 more times between the end of his exercise and today, he always claimed that he had forgotten to bring my helmet. And as a friend, I didn't doubt him at all. Today during soccer, he came, I asked him about my helmet cos I've an exercise coming up as well. Then he finally told me that he had lost my helmet in camp during the exercise - almost 3 months ago. He said he was sorry and he lied cos he was too paiseh to tell me the truth. FUCK U UNDERSTAND! C'mon, in the 1st place, I trusted you to take good care of my helmet. Even though I was hesitant to lend it to you, I eventually still did and this is how U fucking repay me? Though I'm pissed that U lost my helmet, the worst thing was to cover it up and tell me after u ORD. My trust in you was gone once U had lost my helmet. How do U expect me to trust U ever again, especially for the repeated lies U've been telling me? I hate dishonesty. Irresponsibility is 1 thing. Dishonestly is a level higher that truly irks me. I mean, it's like a slap in the face. When I asked you time and again where's my helmet, you told me it was at home. How the fuck do you expect me to react? Smile at you and say it's ok and I had expected that? Even though I played rather well towards the last few games and our guys sitting at the back were cheering me on, I didn't react as usual by giving them a smile or thumbs up, thanking them for the encouragement. At the back of my mind, the same words and image kept repeating itself over again. I really couldn't take it when I'm being lied to, and, he is my friend! I've been living in a lie all these while. It's really depressing to just think of that. My mental state took a toll on my game eventually and before I knew it, I wasn't that keen on continue playing, despite my performance. It's this kind of incident that leaves me wondering sometimes if I should only trust myself. |
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